Day 61 – This is Perfection

I think I may have written about this before, I’m not sure. If I have I apologise in advance for boring you or even bringing you to these ramblings where you now have to think. Today’s thoughts have been inspired by the recent goings on in my soon to be changing life. My character, my judgment and my persona over the past decade or so has been measured by my siblings and to be honest they have found me, as I have found them, to be wanting. Obviously, now that the judgment has been passed I have looked retrospectively at myself and considered their words, as I hope they have considered mine. I believe that I am intelligent enough to see and recognise both sides of a story, even this one where I seem to be the central character, and although I have been far from perfect there are others who too are not either. Although I am not going to get into the detail – that will only even further damage my reputation – I am going to try and explore a side thought that stems from this.

Don’t you find it odd how two or more people can see or live the same series of events simultaneously but each will form their own perception of them and each will explain them and the manner in which it occurred differently. Now I understand that this is pretty basic human behaviour, each will understand differently and this process of understanding will be fed by the person’s experience of events and stimulation in their life to that point.

From kids to adults we go, each of us being bought up differently often through a set of values starkly different to our own. Some will have a distinct and clear knowledge of what is right and wrong, others will place less distinction on the importance of right and wrong. Some, in the same family will embrace, let’s say, religion while their sibling will be an atheist. Others may be academic, some sporty. Some may wear glasses, others have perfect vision. Each of our strengths and weaknesses will directly affect the manner in which we translate happenings and the way we relay them to others. To each of us we would consider our behaviour normal because this is what we are used to; this is what has been ingrained into us. To those witnessing our behaviour, it may well be seen as abnormal behaviour or even anti social. It may well be seen as arrogant or as a lack of understanding and empathy for the other person. It may well be interpreted as disrespect.

So how do we get around this? How do we solve these differences so that each feels fulfilled? It’s easy to say that we should all live perfect lives, that we should all live through the size of our hearts, we should all be generous in our spirit and with our things; but the reality is, that in a dog eat dog world that is South Africa, it is often difficult to do this. It is easy to say that we should change our circle, we should choose more carefully who we mix with. Perhaps, instead of criticizing those, we should seek to understand why these important people in our lives do what they do. Why they have formed bonds with some people that seem out of the ordinary. I am guilty of criticizing others and of not seeking to understand others. I think, no, I know that I am a reasonable person who would not in normal circumstances harm others. And so I speak through these words, not with the arrogance that is within me, but with guilt and a hankering to change my ways. I speak for the important people in my life; those who I hope will try to understand who I am now, not what I was then.

I think we all have a way to go to perfection. Until tomorrow.